Some of you may have been around for the $20 watermelon….or maybe you forgot about the $20 watermelon.
Either way, I'll wait for you to refresh your memory or make a new one. It's important to have this background knowledge.
Here we go.
Apparently, history repeats itself in the produce department. We like to find the things that are ridiculously expensive without realizing it until after we make it through the checkout.
And by that point, knowing how Tim refuses to be shamed by fruit, it's too late.
I partially blame this particular expenditure on doing the GET IT AND GET OUT mad dash that was grocery shopping on Saturday. We were dealing with a baby who wanted to graze any and all items within reach, edible or not, and a child who wanted to be in charge of the grocery list and got upset if we didn't go line by line down the list versus in order of what each aisle had.
I tried to explain how it would not be efficient to go back and forth, up and down the same aisles over and over again, but I don't think it really sank in. At all.
Why, you ask? Well, I was talking to Kellan AND Tim at the same time about completely different things, so instead of giving an important, coherent lesson, it sounded more like, "We need to get all of the things…DID YOU GET THE BREAD?….all of the things in one aisle without having to…YES TWO LOAVES….without having to go back and….ALSO GRAB SOME MILK….forth…MILK? THE HAPPY COW KIND…I know the list isn't in order….YES A WHOLE GALLON….I didn't have time to put it in order….Kellan did you check off bread and milk??
I usually organize the list by aisle but we made one on the fly *as* we drove to the store from a park. I realized we were close to Whole Foods and made a split second decision to go as we drove out of the parking lot.
Looking back, we probably made a whole bunch of errors that led to this expenditure, but hey. That's how we roll. Sometimes. Most of the time….goodbyeeeeee type a trying to take over.
Anyway, Kellan wanted to be in charge of checking things off the list and Hunter wanted to be held and sample anything, whether we put we put it in the cart or not. Kid eats everything. All the time. By the time we left it looked like Hunter had gone into battle with a buffet table and lost…handily.
So, anyhow, the entire time we are grocery shopping my brain is in four places at once and really I cannot ever concentrate fully on one thing. I walk around feeling hectic. I don't know any other way to describe it. I actually feel hectic. Like a swirling dervish of questions and items and what was I doings.
After we filled our cart with mostly things not even on the list (which Kellan protested and then added to the list because details are important, people), I left Tim to handle the checking out on his own. I decided I was getting a smoothie because I was starving.
Kellan spent this time running back and forth between the two of us (straight shot, visible the whole time) to relay information.
Mommy is getting a smoothie.
Daddy asked what size smoothie.
What's in this bag?
Apparently an hour long hike wasn't enough to wear him out.
By the time we got everybody and everything strapped into the car, we sat in the front seats and just stared at each other like what even just happened? Did we even buy anything on the list?
Tim then started going down the receipt to see what all of the "high ticket" items were. Apparently he didn't get to watch the register during checkout, so this was his way of doing it…albeit after the fact.
"What was $10.81??"
He traced his finger along the dotted lines ……what is this……GRAPES?
We bought $10.81 worth of GRAPES???
How many packages of grapes did we buy??
I looked at him all, "One."
This was too much information…or maybe too little information, for Tim.
Why on earth were they ten dollars??? What kind of grapes are ten dollars???
They were organic?
(Apparently that's my go to excuse for expensive produce)
Tim stuffed the receipt in the cup holder all, "These $10 grapes are right on par with that $20 watermelon."
In its defense, it was a really good watermelon….
He kept going under his breath all, "They better be really fantastic grapes for $10. TEN DOLLARS. For grapes!"
And he left it at that until we got home and I tried a few of the grapes.
I looked at him and smiled and said, "These are really good grapes! Totally worth the $10!"
(Because they actually really were)
Tim looks at me dead in the eye and says, "I better not see one. single. grape. in the trash. Not a one!"